Tri-Vector Apocalyspe: War of Emblem, Shun Corp. and Magitek

       My mom is putting so much pressure on me to move out ASAP that it's unbearable to live here. Ive been calling around to see if anyone can come pick me up for a few days. I'll even go to my dads and I don't talk to my Dad that much, I just never have. Probably the mentality my mom put on me about him and alcohol. But I'm desperate for a temporary vacation, wherever the hell I can go...also, my mom is having the cable internet company take away the cable modem on Thursday, so I don't know whether to believe her or not, but judging on how she's been, I'm letting everyone know I won't be on the internet after that, only once in awhile (unless I'm at my dads or a friends with a computer, or somewhere with a wireless connection) until three to five weeks later. But I definantly won't be on as much as I am now. It's unbearable for me to live here with my mom this way...she won't talk to me, today was the first day she actually spoke instead of yelling, but it was just as bad and made me just as angry, because she was demanding that I leave and accusing me of turning down two apartments. I only turned down one, and it was a shared house on the state hospital grounds for people who need "supported living" and I refuse to live there, I want my own apartment, and I don't need assistance living. I can manage on my own, I've been to college and stuff. She's been putting so much pressure on me it's creating a huuuge amount of stress which in turn is making me depressed and that's NOT good for me at all. So, I'll see what happens.

It seems like everyone who likes the shape and proportions of my body live far away...i.e. in other countries. I know some could consider me fat, but some people like thick girls. I was told that most guys like chubby girls, and that the minority doesn't like them, it's just that they haven't come to terms with it. I don't think that's accurate, because of the experiences I've had. It seems like even fat guys don't like fat girls. And the media is embracing the fatness of men...Ralph Lauren is bringing out a special section for big and tall men, but what about Women? It's okay for men to be fat but not women? We're all supposed to look like Pamela Anderson and spend our days in a surgeon's office, or we're supposed to look like Mary Kate Olsen, so anorexic we look like one good gust of wind will make us drop dead? I don't understand, when more than half of the UNITES STATES population is bigger than the sizes Wet Seal and Ambercrombie & Fitch sells. I've thought about protesting about that, and making a video, I'll share more details when I get a digital video camera and put my plan into action, there.

I just want to find someone who likes my body. Someone who likes me for me. Someone close by? Haha. It's not much to ask for, but it's so hard to get.


revesnack says:
the skinny ones may be beautiful in girls world
revesnack says:
but in bed
revesnack says:
they are not well ;)

I wish everyone believed this.